Let’s All Be Robots

Tired of wasting good energy on the vaguaries of free thought? Want to be far more efficient than your puny human body will allow? Then step on up, sit right down and prepare to be robotised. Yes that is a word. No you don’t need to look it up. Check out this call to arms in the Shirtalogue.  Even better, you could win one of three "Lets all be Robots" shirts in our launch competition. See details here.

Even the dyslexics amongst us can spot a moron but we don’t have to be rude about it. I mean morons can’t help the way they are surely? This shirt allows you to give people a gentle introduction to their “issues” without getting caught up in a knife fight! Tell someone how you feel with a spoonerism today.

Check it out now in the Shirticus Online Store and take advantage of our special introductory offer.

Sometimes there just isn’t anything to say. You dig deep into your empathy well only to find it is dry as a bone. Don’t feel guilty at your new found emptiness. Think of it as a little Zen workout, a bhudda-cise if you will. One step closer to lifting the veil on our materiality and dependence on emotional addiction. Or for the more cynical amongst you, the dreadful dawning thought that as a people we have lost the ability to feel. Whatever works.

Check it out now in the Shirticus Online Store.

Do you sometimes feel like you just want to give in to the tireless tide of technology thrust upon your person day after day after day after day? Then do it! With this simple easy to wear t-shirt you can finally say to the corporations who want a piece of your market pie – “Take me I am yours!”. Or perhaps you have a fabulously conservative boss who is dead keen on the wonderous powers of a meaningless bureaucratic system. With one easy application of this t-shirt you can allow your annoying gift for freedom of thought to dissipate into the void and become one with the sleepy pudding that is our one world global market.

Check it out now in the Shirticus Online Store.

Pre-empting stupidity since 1958. Why wait for it to happen? You know it’s going to sooner rather than later. It can happen in the workplace, it can happen at the shops, it can happen in the home, it could be happening right now. Like a lion braiding a zebras mane it awaits for the right moment to strike.

The blind acts of the stupid have laid a curse upon decent folk like your good self for far too long. Make a stand and walk proudly through the fog of dumbness that surrounds you. Look them in the face, gently roll your eyes downwards and say, “Talk to the shirt moron”.

Check it out now in the Shirticus Online Store.

What do you get when you turn an 8 ball on it’s side? The infinity symbol is what! You won’t find an easier way into the void than that!

Note: that this fact was discovered after a night of Absynthe and Laudanum when a certain individual who shall rename nameless (Stu) passed out on the pool table. It took him three weeks to remove the dribble encrusted felt from his cheek.

Check it out now in the Shirtalogue.

Man. He be reading the map being all ‘I’m so logical, and I know which way be north, and I know my cadastre from my topography’. And woman, she be seeing another human woman by the road side and she be using the human power of speech to ask ‘which way’.
And the other human be responding to speech with speech and gesture and before you know it the man be finding himself in the right place: beside his woman. And she be driving.

Men are from Mars women are from Earth.

Check it out now in the Shirtalogue.

Error

It’s amazing that us humans manage to stay alive for as long as we do. The endless variations and permutations of our potential actions, not to mention the limited parameters that allow life make for some uncomfortable math.

All these facts make computers look like the weak and puny machines they are, except for one thing. They have the ability to wipe the slate clean and start again when things go bad. Sure they don’t have feelings or can’t fall in love but just imagine if you could have restarted your day that time you dropped your pants in a church and sung a Tequila fueled version of "Highway to Hell"? Or what about the time when all your friends were sharing their inner most fears and loves and you thought the gate was open to finally divulge your lurid sexual fantasies involving custard, John Howard and a Polar Bear. Feelings and love are over rated.

Thanks to the genius that is Shirticus, you can now act freely and without thought, safe in the knowledge that if things go horribly wrong you can just start again.

Check it out now in the Shirtalogue.

Note: John Howard was not harmed in the writing of this article…despite our best efforts.

PrawnStar

You know you’re cool, it just seems that no one else received the memo. Well if the meek are going to inherit the earth then i say move to Mars baby! Like that tired old sponge cake that just needs 4 inches of icing to make it enticing (rhyming not intentional) you sometimes have to embellish the truth.

This shirt promises instant lifestyle enhancement* without having to pretend that you’re an "adult entertainer".

Check it out now in the Shirtalogue.

* Shirt may not provide lifestyle enhancement.

LogOff

Feeling disconnected by too much connection? Tired of no down time? Thinking that perhaps the machines that were to make us a species of leisure turned us into workaday slaves? Wondering whether life may actually be more important than efficiency? Scared that the Buddhists may be right and that perpetual nothingness is our natural state? Then what are you waiting for? LogOff baby!

See why T-ShirtJunkies.com awarded this shirt their T-Shirt Fix of the Day Award. Check it out now in the Shirtalogue.